If You Can't Beat 'Um, Join 'Um

He used to play with the boys especially by saying, “The Clawww” in a growly voice and using his hand like a claw, he would tickle them. Once when Diana was only ten or eleven months old, while I was busy in the kitchen, he was making beep-beep noises as he poked her nose and cheeks and tummy. I guess she became annoyed with this game after a while because she started crying and then she bit him right on his chest. Of course, I had to comfort her while he sat down and calmly ate his dinner and my dinner got cold.

When they were little, Diana two and John four, they used to ride on his boots when he came home from work and make him walk to the front door with them on his feet. They would then have the privilege of unlacing his boots when he was inside. For this reason, when he’d had a rough day, he would call me before he left work and ask me to get the kids to leave him alone for a few minutes when he got home. On those days I would wait until he was driving up then tell them “Go hide so Daddy can look for you when he gets home.” Ish would relax for a few minutes, have a cold drink or a beer and then go looking for them.

As they got older, (maybe five, seven and ten years old) they liked to wrestle with him. When he came home from work, they would tackle him in the front yard, and he would allow them to take him down and roll around in the grass laughing and squealing.

Anything to make them laugh always being silly and funny he’s fond of making up nonsense sayings like, “I just got back from the BBQ show.” He loves to watch the same movies with the kids over and over. Also, he would express himself by quoting something from a movie like, “NONE?” from The Golden Child, “This is not good!” from Top Gun, also “I’ll be back” from all the Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. Sometimes for no reason at all or just to be funny he would say “In the river!” from Night of the Hunter. The kids understood and picked up the same habit. I’d ask him, “What do you mean by that?”

He would just shrug or say, “Nothing, or I don’t know.” We were married for 34 years before I found out where “In the river!” came from. And of course, the “Pull my finger” prank. But only once.

It should be no surprise that my children have turned out to be pranksters too. One summer weekend after Ish had been swimming in our above ground pool, he lay napping on a lounge chair. Mike our youngest (he must have been 9 years old) decided to play a prank on Dad. He stealthily put the hose with the sprinkler attached underneath his dad’s lounge chair. He conspiratorially handed the camera to his sister Diana. Camera ready they turned on the sprinkler and got a great picture of Dad jumping off the lounge chair and lunging after them. He gleefully chased them around the yard and caught them for a tickle session. Then he and Michael posed for pictures like body builders.

Another time after work he had fallen asleep on the armchair in the living room. He did that often. Mike and Diana tied his shoes together and then went into the kitchen and started yelling “Dad! Dad!” He immediately jumped up and tried to go to them but fell like a downed tree, flat on the carpet with a pitiful, “Owww!” To my surprise he got up laughing.

I was not so pleased and scolded them, “Dad could have been hurt!” But Ish and the kids just giggled and laughed.

The only time I can remember that he got upset was when he was comfortable in sweatpants filling his glass at the sink and had a snack in the other hand. Michael about eleven years old saw this as a good opportunity to “pants” his dad. Ish stood there with a stunned look on his face unable to recover his dignity until he had freed his hands. I tried not to laugh but couldn’t help myself. After that he always wore a belt, even with sweatpants.

When our granddaughter Vanessa was about four years old, she was carefully coloring. Ish was flicking at her cute little pigtails and saying, “boing.”

She tolerated this for a while but finally without looking up she said, “Grandpa, can’t you see I’m concentrating?” He was so amazed at her vocabulary that he just laughed, apologized, and raised his eyebrows smiling at me.

More recently he was attending a pre-diabetes nutrition class at Kaiser Permanente. When he walked into the room, instead of just taking a seat he went up to the instructor and asked “Where should I sit? Which side is for left handers?”

She drawled, “You must have been the class clown in school. Take a seat.” He got the giggles he wanted from some ladies that were sitting together. That wasn’t the first time he was named class clown.

It was summer 2001, at a get together at my sister Corinna’s house. Her teenage kids were there as well as mine. He had everyone’s attention as he told his favorite Hawaiian tour guide’s joke about first time visitors being called “Haole”, second time visitors “kamaʻaina,” and third time visitors are called “Rich.” My nephew having noticed that I rolled my eyes asked, “Have you heard this joke before?”

I answered, “We went to Hawaii in 1989.” I got the bigger laugh that time.